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2:44 a.m. - 2025-02-13 Not to be mistaken for a “cooking" phase mind you, I wasn't making any of the recipes. Nope...just killing time; responding on some base, instinctive level to images of food I'd never taste. It was this recognition (coupled with the genre's predictable "story" structure) that led me to conclude: cooking shows are essentially pornographic. As is most media representing (hence commodifying) our animal instincts. A boxing match for example...or a six hour video of a fireplace burning on your television. Things that our reptile-brains are drawn to and appreciate vicariously. Jacqués Pepin isn't going to serve me coc au vin any more than Traci Lords is going to give me a blowjob, but it seems I'm happy to watch either. And the parallels w/cooking and “smut” vids are compounded by narrative necessity—step, step, step, result. I could list the corollary tropes from each genre, but you get the point (and I'm worried my breadth of knowledge on-topic might strike some as a bit “much”). Perhaps because it's such a pointless and obvious time-filler, my fave approach to this is when the chef brings all the players back for a curtain call. Reciting the same list of ingredients introduced at the top of the episode, but instead of their respective weights and measures, we learn now about their character: “You get that smokey/umami flavor from the ham, and the tangy punch of the pickles...the honey adds a touch of sweetness and the potato chip sprinkles bring a bit of salty crunch.” Super-helpful info for people who've never tried a pickle before. Or forgot what ham tastes like.
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